“Hey Doc, feeling kinda sad”
Doctor, in a low growl, “Do you long to feel the loam of the forest on your footpads?”
Doctor, baring teeth “Do you crave the camaraderie that can only come from stalking prey as a pack?”
“Then ask your Doctor if Lycanthropy™️ is right for you”
“You are my doctor”
“Lycanthropy™️ is right for you”
Just when I thought this Christmas had gone by as just another regular day, and I was gonna commend myself for not feeling bad, I checked my mailbox. Lo and behold, there they were; my Secret Santa gift was a pair of 32GB flash drives.
Thank you, person. Sorry for not checking my mailbox earlier today.
"WHO WANTS TO LISTEN TO MY RICK AND MORTY PODCAST?" I yell.
A figure tumbles out of the bushes and begins to run towards me, a stumbling pace, but at unimaginable speed. "MEEEE, HAHA, IM PICKLE RIIIIIIIIICK" it howls, pinprick pupils rolling erratically in their sockets.
I pull the trigger. The night sky is suddenly visible through the hole between its eyes.
I make a notch and reload my revolver. Once more, I shout "WHO WANTS TO LISTEN TO MY RICK AND MORTY PODCAST?" into the wasteland.
Someone somewhere doing some things.
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