let it be known that we were staying home before it was cool

corona, chuck tingle (lewd) 

Chuck Tingle has come to our rescue. He has released not one but TWO FREE tinglers regarding the current state of emehrgency:

"Not Pounded By Anything While I Practice Responsible Social Distancing"

and

"The Physical Manifestation of Washing My Hands Gets Me Off"

You're welcome: chucktingle.com/getwellsoon.ht

covid shitpost 

covid is the boomer purge we've all been waiting for

two important discoveries I just made

1. where the fuck my business card holder went

2. what that loud banging coming from the dryer was

Lmao Amazon is spamming their job offers again to Sydney developers

"Do you want to relocate to Seattle with the amazing work culture of the united States?"

FUCK NO ill take all the minor inconveniences of Sydney over the actual horror of life in the US, Amazon Dev income or no

uspol/lewd 

More public transit/service tops!

the moral of the story is: eventually the rain will come and wash your car for you

Testing out my new persona Carfucker Bloodmouth, a person with average driving and eating habits

if you want people to work harder for you, for ZERO financial incentive, you gotta make them at least LIKE YOU. and im sorry but i simply don’t like you, and neither do my teammates, and we are not in any way motivated to collectively do any better than we have been (which is honestly not altogether bad, just not the most excellent). it was a waste of payroll that served no purpose.
im not saying i have all the answers but i have had better leaders and i can spot the fucking difference.

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I find this to be very disturbingly irresponsible teaching of technology and internet education to young children.

My niece sent me a link to a digital escape room she made using Google. When I told her I couldn’t access it because I didn’t have a Google account she didn’t understand what that meant. In her mind, everyone has a Google account because otherwise they cannot use the internet.

Seems I’ve got a lot of work ahead of me to reverse all this unhealthy tech learning.

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one time i was standing in a circle of people and speaking in a loud animated manner when a tiny bit of spittle from my mouth arc'd through the air and landed in the eye of a baby being held by its mother.

the baby seemed upset and confused. like performatively so. but you better believe i didn't apologize to that baby. why would I? good luck trying to hold a grudge against me without having basic object permanence, baby!

The fighting game tier system is so superior to numbered rankings in all things.

For instance, my favourite Burger joints:
S: Marys, Down n Out
A: Bar Luca, bettys burger, 5 Points
B: north, ribs n burgers
C: hungry jacks, maccas
F: those homemade diner ones with stale buns from Coles and meat that hasnt cooked through

I don't think bondi beach has any sand on it. Its all dead tourist skin

haiku 

I do not have the
Slightest fucking intention
To fix that printer

Its a shame that I want to make a crossposting app for masto + bird site since to do that I have to do frontend development of some sort and BARF

Dragon Quest XI is a fun light hearted game with the exception of a certain fucked up b plot in the second act who comes up with this shit

if you stan for the triceratops while the styracosaurus is right there you're a fucking idiot. sorry I don't make the rules

it has come to my attention that japan has a detective with a butt for a face

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Mastodon for Tech Folks

This Mastodon instance is for people interested in technology. Discussions aren't limited to technology, because tech folks shouldn't be limited to technology either!