animoji are horrific especially in this number

wwdc 

ah widgets

that thing android has had for like uhhhhh

ten years?

:^)

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wwdc 

i will never stop being snarky about how android has had these features for like, ever

not in a "come on stealing android features" way but in a "it took you ten years to make widgets?" way

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wwdc 

stop talking like this is all the most revolutionary shit come on

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wwdc 

okay temporarily docking the PiP is actually neat

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wwdc 

"20 times more facts" sounds like something that would go in a parody

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wwdc 

"memoji"

DO NOT TELL ME THIS IS WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE

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wwdc 

oh "memoji" is just the fuckin animoji avatars

i thought it'd be some fucking meme-emjoi or something and i was about to die

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wwdc 

so uh, imessage is catching up with every other messaging service now

okay

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wwdc 

"other countries other than the US exist, turns out, so we're mapping those too"

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wwdc 

"oh cycling mapping, that looks better than google maps'"

"oh it's literally only in like six cities, fuck that"

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wwdc 

if your mapping shit is exclusive to like, a handful of cities, it's useless as fuck dont @ me

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wwdc 

"the only people that matter are those who live in these big cities" literally fuck off

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wwdc 

mapping is not something that can be fucking made work locally for a handful of places lmao

the entire point is to make shit general so it'll work like, almost anywhere

otherwise who's gonna want to use it if they don't trust that it'll work where they are

fuck sake

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wwdc 

"leave your keys at home"

lmao fuck no

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wwdc 

how was the digital security of car keys a problem anyone realistically ever had

fuck using my phone for something as important as my car

never trusting that my phone will be reliable enough to use it to access my car entirely

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wwdc 

apps were a fucking mistake

wwdc 

"here's a small app that instantly launches and has no possibility of being vetted for if you're somehow getting MITM'd and sent to a malicious app"

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wwdc 

slap a malicious NFC tag onto whatever stupid bullshit launches it especially on those "rental scooters" and boom funnel in the money

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wwdc 

can you acquire misophonia triggers? i think the word "app" is about to do that

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wwdc 

why is everyone else's stream a few seconds ahead of mine ahaha

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wwdc 

"we've finally realized that it's 2020 and nothing needs to take over your entire screen to notify you about an incoming call anymore"

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wwdc 

hot take: stop trying to make handwriting -> text a thing

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wwdc 

"magically* switch over"

*it might work like, once and then never again

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wwdc 

can we talk about how "airpods pro" is the most fucking awkward name for anything ever

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wwdc 

okay i really don't think anyone will give a shit about this 3d audio bullshit beyond it being a gimmick they pay attention to once from a video that demos the feature

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wwdc 

everyone else: firstname/lastname introduction

this guy: "Kevin"

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wwdc 

"complications" is such a fucking terrible name for a feature too

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wwdc 

seriously i cannot get over why they thought anyone in 2020 wanted a tachymeter on their fucking watch

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wwdc 

i'm still not 100% sure what the fuck a tachymeter is or how the fuck it works

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wwdc 

ah again, the cyclist feature that works in like five cities so who fucking cares

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wwdc 

people who wear their watch while they sleep are not human dont @ me

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wwdc 

android has had this sleep thing for a while

it also turns your screen to monochrome when it's past the bedtime you set

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wwdc 

@mdszy computers were a mistake. we should never have left the oceans

wwdc 

@mdszy this is just progressive web apps with extra steps

wwdc 

@mdszy my mom is the only person I know that does that and I know it's just because she can't touch type very fast and can't hold the pen and type.

re: wwdc 

@mdszy i briefly tried it and it was very weird

like, "wow I slept poorly last night, I had no idea"

wwdc 

@mdszy Fitbit might count, I've not really taken it off at all times of the day unless I had to recharge it or gotta shower

re: wwdc 

@mdszy shake my head having to buy a city designed specifically for your apple devices because apple doesn't follow standards

wwdc 

@mdszy might be a really nice feature here in about-to-be-flooded-land, lmao

wwdc 

@mdszy to be fair, only like five cities support cycling too

re: wwdc 

@mdszy it helps you calculate the speed of things based on time/distance

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tachymeter_(watch)

I don't know why anyone would actual use one

re: wwdc 

@mdszy it's what they're called for actual analog watches, so it kind of makes sense

re: wwdc 

@shadowfacts ah right i thought i remembered that being the case

it sounds very non-apple tho

wwdc 

@mdszy "components" might hit the same ballpark, but "compilations" give an entirely different idea lmao

wwdc 

@mdszy I thought that too, but it’s actually in reference to real wrist watches: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complica

wwdc 

@mdszy don't talk to me about 3d audio unless you can give humans a third ear

re: wwdc 

@mdszy "We noticed Android does it and figured we waited long enough to copy them and still seem innovative"

re: wwdc 

@clarjon1 they also added homescreen widgets, hasn't android had those for almost ten years lol

wwdc 

@mdszy I always thought that was fuckin' annoying as hell. There's so much UX crap that's just holdovers from porting iOS to the iPad.

wwdc 

@mdszy “We introduced this to give us another justification for why we have to stay in control of the App Store. Look how bad this new feature would be if non-Apple-vetted third party apps were allowed! Take that, regulators!”

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