Butternut squash ravioli with a browned butter sage sauce would be the mood for dinner tonight. Topped with toasted pecans.

Waking up and realizing you can't sate your endless desire for content and should probably start making your own is a sobering way to find other things to do.

Suddenly cleaning my house is a *very* compelling thing to do.

Watching someone who's been on countless hit records shred next to $20,000 worth of gear gets old fast, especially when you can tell the content isn't meant to inform but to show off the creator's skills. That has its place, but not as the massive, Texas toast-sized slices of bread for a single slice of extra-thin advice in the metaphorical sandwich of video content.

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Basically, guitar YouTube is demotivating because it's generally a bunch of gigging professionals who are using it to get more gigs under the guise of providing "wisdom" to the masses, where the wisdom usually boils down to "here's what I, a professional, do professionally with all the time I have as a professional musician". That's not wisdom, that's a to-do list.

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Like, you would think I'd be able to learn something from videos and come away inspired by seeing people posting their accomplishments, but for some reason it's not and I come away from the video wondering why I just watched someone stroke their own ego and push their brand down my throat.

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It's strange, deciding to give up watching videos pertaining to a hobby because they don't motivate you to pursue that hobby but in fact have the opposite effect.

Over the past year and a half, I have been becoming progressively more and more mentally fatigued. I can overcome it for a time, but ultimately it's like taking a nap when you've lost ten days of sleep. And I don't see an end in sight.

Aight, so why not subsidize Xcode Cloud with the $99 membership fee? Or with the ~$90B you make from the 30% App Store tax? But, knowing Apple, you'll probably get like 30 build minutes for $4.99.

I'm sorry, but when discussing security and privacy, I only understand things when I'm dealing with "Alice" and "Bob", not "Katie" and "Eric".

Why does state ID cards coming to Apple Wallet make me say, "Finally! We're in the future!"

food, eating habits 

At this point, I'm literally running on coffee and fumes. It's been an interesting experience, and looking at the next five weeks, where I have a goal of 1600 calories/day and have more reasonable diet restrictions (more protein, 3 6-8oz servings) I can't help but think, "Shit that's a lot of food."

Weird how quickly perception can change.

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food, eating habits 

So this week I've been participating in a nutrition challenge at my gym. It's six weeks, with a "before" and "after" body scan. The first week is a "detox" week, where I am severely limited in what I can eat (2 3oz servings of protein, 2 ~1cup servings of fruit, unlimited veggies).

freenode 

me: the exploitative relationship between capitalism and FOSS is bad
FOSSbros: ACTually it's ok, sure there's some exploitation but the benefits are worth it
freenode: *gets destroyed by capitalists*
FOSSbros: :pika_surprise:

You are a contestant on a game show. The host shows you three doors, behind two of which are goats and the other a car. You pick the left one. The host opens one of the other doors to reveal a goat. You meet eyes with the goat. The goat meets eyes with you. As you lock eyes, the chatter from the host and the live studio audience fades away. You see a glimmer of recognition behind those eyes. You think you know the goat. Maybe the goat knows you. Suddenly, a spark: you realize the goat IS you. You ARE the goat. You are seeing yourself as the goat, and the goat sees itself as you, and you are seeing yourself as the goat. You no longer see yourself. You wander off the stage, and exit through a door propped open. On the other side is a grassy plain. You trot around to look behind you; you see a grassy plain. The sun is hot above you. The grass is soft beneath your hooves. You bend down to chew a mouthful of grass. From the distance, you hear baaing from other goats. It is time to rejoin them.

You know that feeling you get when you look at an open-source project and realize you've been implementing a subset of its features over the past six months, but worse?

Don't tell my boss I'm having that right now looking at some of the more obscure features in Prometheus.

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