Inappropriate joke Show more
Colleague: that's the shortest patch cable I've ever seen
Me: that's not what your girlfriend said last night
Doctor: “Remember. Don’t use your broken arm until it’s heal. I warned you before. You just make it worse.”
Patient: “If I add parentheses around the cast will it silence the warning?”
The life and death of a laptop battery.
@Miredly Anyone who says getting the flu shot is worse than getting the flu, has NEVER had a true case of influenza.
A full-bore case of influenze will put you down HARD for days at a minimum. Worst case, it will kill you.
The chef of an upscale restaurant collided with a waiter one day and spilled coffee all over their computer. The liquid poured into the processing unit, and resulted in some dramatic crackling and popping sounds.
After sopping up the mess, they gathered around the terminal as the computer was turned back on. "Please let it work," pleaded the guilt-ridden waiter.
A waitress replied, "Should be faster than ever. That was a double espresso."
Tonight at 7pm EDT (23:00UTC), mastodon.technology will enter a 2-hour maintenance window. No upgrades to app code are being performed, but a solution to member problems will be applied. Expect intermittent reboots causing ~20s of downtime each. Thanks for your patience, direct any questions to @ashfurrow.
Programmer and uncomfortable pain in the ass. Fluent in more programming languages than I can list, most happy in C and C++. If I’ve helped, please tip. Thanks!
This Mastodon instance is for people interested in technology. Discussions aren't limited to technology, because tech folks shouldn't be limited to technology either! We adhere to an adapted version of the TootCat Code of Conduct and follow the Toot Café list of blocked instances. Ash is the admin and is supported by Fuzzface, Brian!, and Daniel Glus as moderators. Hosting costs are largely covered by our generous supporters on Patreon – thanks for all the help!