Announcement about our app:

The latest update will ask for permission to turn on the camera even when the app isn't open.

Rest assured this is due to technical restrictions and has nothing to do with harvesting more images.

Rumours of NSA involvement cannot be commented on at this time.

We've sent a focus group to figure out how we can adjust our figures to appear more diverse.

Show thread


We KNOW we have only 3 women on our team of 10,000.

We're working on it. The problem is the women keep quitting. Something about the guys "looking at boobs all day" and "lewd comments."

Hey ladies! Participate in our program and remind men you exist too!

The boys at the office spent all week coming up with that one.

A reminder that our terms of service EXPLICITLY state that our new venture, InstaPorn.XXX, with images crowdsourced from our users, is completely permissible. We have a complete license to your photos.

Don't worry, we'll change the names! No one will know it's you!

Once again: rumours that we have "Wacky Genital Wednesday" where we look for the weirdest genital pics are just complete falsehoods probably fabricated by @twitter and Snapchat.

We at Instagram care about your privacy and are not laughing at the pictures of his penis. Honest.

Show thread

We won't tell your boyfriend about that sexting session you had with your ex. Promise.

We at Instagram FIRMLY BELIEVE:

* Sharing is caring
* Sharing your images is good
* Share all the images on your device
* We don't care if they're nudes or if you're fat or ugly
* Good artists copy

@twitter hey when are your investors gonna demand you make a shitty clone of us that probably limits images to 140x140?

Mastodon for Tech Folks

This Mastodon instance is for people interested in technology. Discussions aren't limited to technology, because tech folks shouldn't be limited to technology either!